I wet my be... Wait a minute! Who writes these headlines?

Although I suppose there could be worse alternatives¹

It all began with "Let there be light", although that might be taking an introduction to the topic a little too far.  Suffice to say, sleeping in my bed has become a bit of an adventure (not that I'm suggesting that anyone other than I try it²) since a recent ant invasion.  I'm not sure if any uncles³ were involved, but I immedia soonishly binged⁴ "get rid of ants", which led me to a page that suggested a teaspoon of rubbing alcohol, a teaspoon and a half of dish soap, and some water in a spray bottle.  Being a man, I of course didn't measure.  Furthermore, since it doesn't say where exactly to spray, I tried spraying it directly on them and found their claim that the ants "will stay clear away from" the solution because of the alcohol was a little understated.  Specifically, they weren't alive enough to do so after a shot or two, although that might be because of the dish soap rather than the rubbing alcohol.


¹ My bed has a wet spo⁵.... NO! NO! NO!  Bad headline writer, bad!  Anyway, it's gone now.
² Although that might (or might not) be subject to change in the future.
³ A joke the appreciation of which will be severely reduced by those who pronounce "aunt" as "awnt".
⁴ It's like Googling, except using Bing.
⁵ Not that I mind discussing topics involving that subject.  It's just that I wasn't referring to the common definition of that term.  Furthermore, I would think that towels (either under the affected area before or over afterwards) would usually solve the problem.

What fun can one guy have with two pairs of nearly indentical glasses?

Another busy day, another late, quick post.  So let's get down to it: Just seeing how long it takes people to realize I not only have new glasses, but two new pairs of them.    While the brown/gold-ish pair do look a lot like my old pair (the new ones are a bit darker in the frame, but lighter on the "plastic" ear covering), I would think the sudden absence of the tape used to hold the old pair together would make it obvious.  Or maybe I did too good of a job with the scotch tape so that no one noticed it?  However, I suppose that means that you, my dear and loyal readers, are privy to a secret that the virtually the rest of the world knows nothing about.  So don't go telling anyone, make them suffer for not reading my blog even if they don't know they're suffering, 'kay?
Got to get ready for work.  Just remember to tune into (maybe) the same Jon-time, on the same Jon-blog.

Today's quick trivia question: what label first makes its appearance with this post?

I'm going Gotham style (Op, op, op, op)

(With Apologies to Psy)

That certainly was a lot painful than I thought.  Only $170 for two pairs of glasses.  It would have $150 but I added on the option of UV400 coating for $10/pair.  It also helps that I forewent both the progressive (which I probably wouldn't have included even if it didn't cost extra) and polychromic lens options.  Anyway, I bought them at Complete Eye Care Center (location: 2825 Crenshaw Blvd, Los Angeles, CA 90016).  The frames are more or less identical (except one is "gold", the other "silver") and based on remembering seeing "Gotham" and what I remember of the logo, forgot that, I just saw that they have the manufacturer's name (GOTHAMSTYLE) and the design (STAINLESS# 5 CE) on the inside of one of the arms and the color (BROWN for the "gold" pair and "GUN" for the "silver") on the other.
Then, to top them off, I ordered two pairs of Square Lite Smoke and a pair of  Delta "fits over" sunglasses, plus a Foster Grant lens repair and cleaning kit online from Dioptics Sunwear.  They would have been $57.60 altogether, but the sunglasses were 50% off, which made it only $32.17.  I'll have to write a follow up post tomorrow since it's getting time for me to go to work.  Hasta la vista, person-of-indeterminate-age!

Starting over

Or, I Guess I Got What I Paid For

Long story short: I took my glasses off to place them on top of the cabinet and dropped them on the floor.  As tired as I was, I failed to look where I stepped and my foot landed on top of them, with predictable results.  All efforts to try to fix them failed, so I thought maybe I could order another pair of frames and pop the lenses into them.  Unfortunately, the place I bought them from doesn't sell frames only.  I know that they say that into every life, a little rain must fall, but sometimes it seems like it's pouring over here.  But I have survived a lot worse, so I suppose it will turn out ok.
So... I have temporarily have had to return to using the falling-apart-but-still-usable-if-taped-together old pair and will have to check into buying a new new pair tomorrow. But if I can't blog tomorrow, that's why.  Thankfully, I just got paid last Friday and don't have to worry about rent until next paycheck.  So cue Gloria Gaynor...

I guess that's it until September 5

Just another thing to like about September, I suppose, as it's also a three-paycheck (2, 16, and 30) month.  Not that three-paycheck months have always been kind to me, but that's a story I'll save until later.  For now, it's back to the daily grind- and I'm not talking about coffee.  Then again, it is what it is and all there is to it is to make the best of it.  Beyond work, my step-grandson and I plan to go through the house and figure out what we want to donate of my deceased wife's stuff, mostly from the kitchen and bath as most of her items from the bedroom I've already sorted and boxed (as in put in boxes, not engaged in pugilistic encounters) and she didn't really have all that much in the living room. 

The good, the bad, and the glasses

While the glasses I bought online probably wouldn't be ones I would buy in person at a brick and mortar, they aren't terrible. First, the negatives:

1. Not only are they not metal frames, but the plastic doesn't appear to be all that durable. I could be wrong, but, then again, I wouldn't stress test them to find out.
2. I don't like small frames as the tops and/or bottoms of the frames tend to get in the line of vision.  Also, anything in my line of vision that are above or below the frames aren't as sharp as objects viewed with the lenses and I find that annoying.
3. Progressive lenses are going to take some getting used to and I'm not certain I want to.  I'll give it a few days try before making a decision though.  However, I'm currently strongly considering seeing if I can get different lenses put in.
4. Looking at something while turning my head can be... interesting (as in "may you live in interesting times" type of interesting.)

Now, for the good:

1. They're cheap.
2. Polychromic lenses seem to work as advertised.
3. They're cheap.
4. They're better than having a pair of glasses that seem to be in constant danger of falling apart as long as I can get the lens issues worked out.
5. They're cheap.
6. They seem to function properly.
7. I would ask "Did I mention that they're cheap", but that tends to be overused, so I won't.  Forget I even mentioned it.

The glasses are coming! The glasses are coming!

Featuring the Amazing Disappearing Tracking Number!

They're supposed¹ to be here tomorrow!

¹ As if everything in life went the way it was supposed to....

Getting a buzz....

Or, Shave and a Haircut... No bits

Decided to tame the unruly mane on top of my head by getting out the electric hair clippers today¹.  Then again, I have tended to prefer function over form anyway.  As long as it's inexpensi- on second thought, let's call it what it is, cheap, I don't have to find a barber or schedule an appointment, and I can do it myself, it's my hair and it doesn't really bother what other people think about ti  Plus, needing to use less shampoo and no styling gel means I save money, not to mention that I don't have to waste time maintaining it.  Finally, it'll probably be cooler (temperature-wise, rather than in terms of popularity).

Weird stat of the day: for some reason my page views spiked to 283 yesterday¹- or almost 5 times the 2nd most page views in one day of 58 and probably more than seven days¹ previous combined. At first I was wondering whether the comment I posted on disqus.com had drawn some attention, but that site isn't mentioned among the traffic sources.

¹ All references to days are from the perspective of June 29 (the date on the post) rather than June 30 (the date I actually posted it).  In other words, for the purposes of this post, today means the 29th, and yesterday means the 28th.

Not quite done with bedroom updates

Or, Which Books Where?

After finally getting the bookshelf up, I find myself at an impasse as to which books I want to move from the living bookcase onto it: the bigger ones, which would leave more space in front of the smaller ones left behind, or the smaller ones, which are less likely to warp the singly-stacked boards? Furthermore, I had to explain to my grandson that just because I had cleared off a shelf in the living room that that doesn't mean it will stayed clear (i.e., that I might have to move some of the books back out there) to make sure that he doesn't cover a bookshelf I might need later with photos or similar stuff. Finally, between starting this post and then eventually getting back to finishing it, I left a comment in an internet discussion in response to someone (who happened to be atheist) who said his significant other was dying of ovarian cancer. Shared some of my experience going through a similar situation with Lorena and how quickly it went from thinking she had years to live still to her death. A bit drained by it, so I'll end here.

Bedroom update update!

Seeing how my pageviews spiked to 57 yesterday (although probably most of those were mine from checking several tweaks I did on the blog), I figured I might as well try to see if using "bedroom" and/or "update" in the title would work again.  Anyway, while trying to place books on the bookshelf I wrote about yesterday, I discovered that a great many of the books were higher than the ~7½" height of the cement blocks I bought.  Thus, one little piggie and his nine "siblings" must hie themselves back to the market to buy blocks with more height and, since I'm at it anyway, wood for a couple more shelves.  Thankfully, I'll be going to a closer store (1.6 miles/31 minutes according to google maps vs. 2.2 miles/48 minutes) because my grandson isn't feeling well and won't be able to take me.  Of course, I'm writing this all out before I go, only to post it once I get back.
So, I grabbed a ½ gallon of horchata (I'll explain later) at Food 4 Less, a couple of machaca burritos at Chile Verdes , then swung over to Home Depot only to find out I forgot the order number and they couldn't find it under my name.  Therefore (oh, the horror of it all!) I had to go and grab the items myself .  Thus laboring and heavy laden, I pushed my cart (and I do mean my cart, not the stores- hmph!) home in about the ½ hour allotted by google maps).  There I gave my grandson his food (before anyone questions how I could have left him home alone, especially since he's not Macaulay Culkin, when he's not feeling well, I would like to remind readers he's over 20), chowed down on mine, took a quick cold shower (because of the heat, people, because of the heat), typed out this epilogue, hit first publish and then the hay.

Bedroom update!

Or, It's Not What You Think¹

Listen up, you yahoos!  I know what probably many of you might be thinking after reading such a titillating and tantalizing title: he's been recently widowed, he's posting this after a Saturday night (spent prowling meeting places, no doubt), and now he's talking about the bedroom, so it must be about that.  Puh-lease!  Give me more credit than that.  If I had found another companioness to companionate² with, I would have informed my family immediat... well, at least one week before our wedding⁴, if past performance is any indicator of future results⁶.
Anyway, after my wife died, I tossed the too-small cupboard (that's the closet... closest approximation that I can think of.  Although it wasn't made to hold cups, it was about the same size and had a shelf which we somehow lost) and only-slightly-bigger "media center" and moved the TV and the computer/computer desk about a month ago, during which time I somehow lost the cord that connects the TV to the cable box.  A few days later, while calling the cable company to find out why the TV wasn't picking up any channels, I managed to disconnect the cable box and lose misplace it as well (Trend?  What trend?).  Then, just yesterday, I built fabricated constructed formed a bookshelf, the details of which can be found in various footnotes. The next step I plan to undertake involves moving books that I had stacked on the bookshelf in the living room to the bookshelf I... had a hand in the formation of in the bedroom.  Plus, while I have more or less separated items of hers that I have no interest in keeping, I still have to get them boxed up and see if my grandson wouldn't mind helping me take them to a donation center.

Getting so much (or at least somewhat) better all (or at least some of) the time

Then again, I suppose it depends on what's getting better.  Physically, I feel good... like I knew that I would now.  Ok, maybe "know" is a bit strong considering how I have been feeling the past few days due to the heat.  However, at the moment, whether it's because it's early morning and it hasn't heated up yet, the temperature has cooled a little, or maybe my figuring out that the fan has a high¹ setting for a reason, I seem to have a bit more energy.  Oh, great.  Just as I finish writing that, my eyes don't want to stay open.  After these messages, I'll be right back.
So... did you miss me?  Of course you did.  But let's return to our feature discussion and turn to how I have been dealing with my wife's death.  That remains virtually unchanged: long periods of coping followed by gut-wrenching moments of one thing or another reminding me of her.  Even events as innocuous as buying a rotisserie chicken (the focal point of many of meal since moving to Los Angeles) become an opportunity for such an attack, as if going to or arriving at one of the bus stops near our home or shopping at the pharmacy that filled her prescriptions or the other stores and restaurants in the same plaza didn't provide enough.  Yet from the very fields of familiarity where grow such weeds of sorrow also sprout forth the soothing herbs of tender memories.  Perhaps time can teach me how to better tend the latter while eliminating the other.

'Cause this is filler, filler night...

Since I missed a few days of posting a while back and now find myself with some news I want to share, but don't find it interesting enough to put on the front page, I figured why not kill two birds¹ with one stone and simply postdate the post?  I finally got around to adding videos to my recent widower review posts that review song lyrics only to find that I must have clicked the "revert to draft" button instead of "update", so I had to fix that as well².

¹ Figurative ones only.  No actual birds were harmed in the writing of this post.
² I hope such news doesn't cause heart palpitations for anyone.

Brain-fried

If my posting the next few days seems sporadic, it is due to the lethargy-inducing heat here in Los Angeles.  Even when I have been able to come up with topics, developing them into a presentable post has sapped my already low energy.  The blog should show some improvement once I become acclimated to it, but for now, I'm just too tired.  That's pretty much all I can write on the matter at the moment.

Looking for Mr. Goodframe

Currently looking into buying a new pair of glasses and having to decide to buy locally or online. The main problem with the latter is that the place I got the prescription from refuses to give a pupillary distance without a purchase of glasses at their store, which means I would have to find a way to measure it for myself. While I don't have a problem with them having such a policy, the same cannot be said for their failure to notify of said policy before the exam since that may have altered my decision. Then again, that would not be necessary if I had just kept my previous prescription since it supplied that information. Furthermore, I have had a hard time finding a decently priced (read: cheap) pair of metal frames with a solid nose bridge instead of nose tabs online. On the other hand, there's no guarantee I would be able to do so locally either. On top of that, the optometrist I saw recommended that I get progressive and photochromic¹ lenses, which adds considerably to the cost. Decisions, decisions, decisions.
Update (06/21/16): Bought some online, will give more info in a later post).

¹ Yes, you stupid spell check, "photochromic"² is a word.
² Suggested alternate spellings: "photo chromic" and "photo-chromic". Who creates these word lists anyway?

¿Como te voy olvidar cuando no puedo?

Translation: ¿How can I forget you when I cannot?

Although this Recent Widower's Review includes another foray into my translating Spanish into English, my task should run a bit smoother as I won't have to decipher my wife's handwriting and spelling as well.  However, I will slightly change the format a little.

The song starts with repeating amor six times and although the word is literally translated as "love", a better translation in context would be "my love" since it's addressed to a person.  Note: count on hearing/reading this word a lot throughout the song.  Note the second: that certain describes my wife.
Even though the next line ("Quiero que me vuelvan a mirar tus ojos") is grammatically correct Spanish, it still causes difficulties for online translators because "in Spanish, changes in the word order can be heard in everyday conversation or seen frequently in everyday writing such as that found in newspapers and magazines."  Google, for example, bungles it completely as "I want you to look into your eyes again" by completely ignoring the "me".  Bing's rendering of the sentence as "I want to get me to look at your eyes" is a bit closer, yet confuses the object and subject.  However, in this sentence, it is the verb that determines the object rather than word order.  In other words, since "vuelvan" is third person plural, the subject has to be a third person noun- and the only noun that fits that description is "tus ojos".  It is easy to understand why the song writer chose this particular word order (i.e., he needed a rhyme for "rojos"), but placing the two "misplaced" subject in the normative spot before the verb (i.e., "Quiero que tus ojos [subject] me [object] vuelvan [verb] a mirar") fixes the translation problem for both Google and Bing: "I want your eyes to look at me again".  Unfortunately, something that is no longer possible for my wife.
After another couple of lines of thrice-repeated "amor", we come to "Quiero volver a besar tus labios rojos", which Google inexplicably translated as "I never want to kiss your red lips".  Bing wins another round almost by default with a closer-but-still-no-cigar "I want to kiss your red lips", since it omits that pesky "volver a".  Including a translation for those two words would make it "I want to go back/return to kiss (or kissing) your red lips".  Yet another nonviable option in regards to my deceased wife.
The next four lines also contain several pitfalls for translation.  Not only do lines one and two (Comó no acordarme de ti and De que manera olvidarte; literally, "How not to remember to me of you" and "Of what way to forget you"), for example, contain infinite verbs and omit a subject altogether, but they build on each other: "How can I not remember you/ In what way can I forget you / If everything reminds me of you ('Si todo me recuerda a ti')/ [and] You are ('estás tú') everywhere ('En todas partes')?".  More on this after the rest of the song.
The singer then goes on to mention a couple of places where "you" are ("estás tú" or just "estás"): a rose and (literally) "to breathe", i.e., "act of breathing".  I haven't seen my wife in any roses, but then again, I haven't looked at many roses since her death other than those that someone (probably one of her daughters or sisters) brought to her final viewing.  As for seeing her in the act of breathing, that comes and goes.  Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't.
This is followed by the repeated line "How will I forget you?" (Como te voy a olvidar), which will also repeat twice after the next two lines.  The next two places the singer finds "you" is in "kissing the cross" ("besando la cruz") and praying a prayer ("rezando una oracion"), both which carry a religious significance, the first of which (i.e., kissing the cross) I do not participate in and the second of which I would attach only to the love of God and not another person, up to and including my wife.
Now we come to the only part of the song that isn't repeated again:
Si te clavaste aqui en mi corazon (If you have embedded yourself here in my heart)
Y mi amor, has llenado mi alma (And my love, you have filled my soul)
Y tu sangre corre por mis venas (And your blood runs in my veins)
Y mi sangre me hace estremecer (And my blood makes me shake/tremble)
Yo contigo (I with you)
All I can say about this part is I guess it's supposed to be romantic... and maybe it is and I just have poor taste in judging whether something is romantic or not.

We should turn at the... say what?

Continuing the "say what" series of posts (began here and continued here), today's tantalizing tale tells of a time that occurred shortly after Lorena and I moved to Los Angeles and had to fill out the forms to transfer the payments for her Supplemental Security Income (SSI) disability from Salinas.  Our first attempt to do so landed us at the wrong building and one of the workers there told us where to go.  In our rush to get the task done, however, we forgot to get the directions for how to get there.  We soon remedied our lack of information at a nearby bus stop by requesting it from another lady waiting there.  I cannot recall most of what she told us mainly because I quickly concentrated on a single detail: that her directions involved us going north until we reached a green line.  Or rather, the green line, which seemed even more bizarre to me at the time, for I imagined my wife and I having to walk while searching for a literal green line (painted?) on the street (if you're reading this from the home page, you'll have to click below to read the rest...).

My lady in red (or whatever color[s] she chose to wear)

Today's Recent Widower Review comes courtesy of Chris De Bergh^22¾

I've never seen you looking so lovely as you did tonight
I've never seen you shine so bright

Every day she grew lovelier in my eyes.

I've never seen so many men ask you if you wanted to dance
They're looking for a little romance, given half a chance

I might have a few objections to that.

And I have never seen that dress you're wearing
Or the highlights in your hair that catch your eyes,

Then again, my wife was a prolific shopper, although there were several pieces of clothing (but only one dress) that I don't ever recall seeing her wear, some with tags still on them.  As the three packages of men's dress socks and three tubes of shower body wash that I found unopened further demonstrate, she always seemed to be buying items to use for later but then never got around to using them.  Furthermore, she wasn't much of a dress wearer, because I only found the one aforementioned dress.

I have been blind

But then again, we all seem to be in our own little ways.  I'm no exception to that.

The lady in red...

I haven't really come across much of her clothing that is red.  She did have a pair of pink pajamas and two (actually four, but two of them were quite small and designed to be worn with their respective piece among the other two and thus I wouldn't consider them separate) other garments that I would call sleepwear except however often I may have seen her wear them to bed, I don't recall her actually getting to sleep in them.

...is dancing with me, cheek to cheek

If we ever danced together, I don't recall it.  It doesn't seem to be an activity that she enjoyed.

There's nobody here, it's just you and me

And sometimes one or two of three grandsons, one daughter, or one sister living with us, if I remember correctly.  Although I think the total time would be less than a year.  Also, she went to visit various family frequently, so sometimes it wasn't even just her and me.

It's where I want to be

Always and forever, love of my life.

but I hardly know this beauty by my side

Maybe I should have asked more, but she didn't seem to like revealing much of her past life before she met me.

I'll never forget the way you look tonight

Sometimes such visions haunt me, sometimes they comfort me, and sometimes they do both.

I've never seen you looking so gorgeous as you did tonight
I've never seen you shine so bright, you were amazing
I've never seen so many people want to be there by your side

And now we're back to a slight variation of the first few lines.  Although she was amazing.  Nor would I mind people wanting to be by her side (well, depending on the reason) like I would men wanting to dance with her while looking for romance.

And when you turned to me and smiled, it took my breath away
And I have never had such a feeling
Such a feeling of complete and utter love, as I do tonight

... and every other night.  The rest is mostly chorus and repetition until the last line, so I'll just skip to that:

I love you

 I can't think of anything to add to that.

It's Laundry Day!

Or, What I'm Going To Post in Lieu of Something I'm Working On,
But Have Not Quite Finished

Although I did learn one valuable (at least to me) lesson: I had a smilie of someone washing clothes ready to use, but it was on http which conflicts with the https protocol established by Blogger/Blogspot.  So all you would have seen is: .
Okay, now it is working in preview when it didn't previously.  So if you can see it, enjoy.  If you cannot, at least I have told you why.  All it was showing was a black square with a broken pane of glass in the middle that I'm sure most of you have either seen or seen something close enough and across the top of the post was an error message.  It was there... I'm telling you it was there¹ [sounds of hysterical sobbing ensue].

Don't try this at home (or anywhere else, for that matter)

I have always had a... peculiar... sense of humor as far as I can recall and I doubt I would have lived (and remained within shouting distance of sanity) as long as I have without the ability to find whimsy in even the most trying times.  Probably just as important to my continued survival (and avoidance of jail time), though, is that I lack the proclivity to follow through on such deeds mischievous despite how many of them I might dream up.  To put it another way, it is largely the same imagination that allows to think up such ideas that prevents me from carrying them out.  Case in point: while transporting my wife's urn/ashes back to Los Angeles from my step-daughter's apartment, I wondered what would happen if I "accidentally on purpose" left them on the train.  Mind you, I haven't taken leave of senses to the point where I would do that, for her remains are far too valuable to me to try.  For example, whoever found them might report them as a suspicious package and they might receive less than ideal treatment by those called in to deal and/or dispose of them, especially in this age of heightened security.  However, I don't think anyone has yet devised a way to punish someone for merely having such thoughts, thus allowing me to indulge in a capricious mental exercise of visualizing the reaction of the poor, unsuspecting soul who happened upon them had I actually gone through with it.